~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Take Away
Tent
Testing
The Bride Stripped Bare By "Bachelors"
The Equestrian Statue
The Hard To Get
Them
These Things
The Time Is Now
The Time Of Our Lives
The Womble Bashers Of Walthamstow
The Worm and the Angel
The Worst is Yet to Come
Things I Could've Said
Think Before You Speak
This Love Of Ours
Three At A Time
Three Piece Suite
Time To Kill
Tinsel And String
Topless A-Go-Go
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Take Away
Walkin' the street
Hopin' to meet
A real-life Satan's daughter
Oh what I'd give for a chance to be with
A queen of the red-light quarter
"Open All Night", the sign was so bright
I found myself steppin' inside
"What'll it be" she said lookin' at me
I said "whaddaya got"
She replied,
"Do you want to eat it here or take it away?
It makes no difference to me as long as you pay
I'm open seven days a week, twenty-four hours a day
So do you want to eat it here or take it away?"
Well I'm just a poor boy a long way from home
And I have to admit I been drinkin'
I was feeling cocksure but I don't anymore
And there's no reason to my way of thinkin'
"I'll take it away", I heard myself say
But by now I had no appetite
I was feeling so strange as I picked up my change
And walked out into the night
Do you want to eat it here or take it away?
It makes no difference to me as long as you pay
I'm open seven days a week, twenty-four hours a day
So do you want to eat it here or take it away?
Well do you want to eat it here or take it away?
It makes no difference to me as long as you pay
I'm open seven days a week, twenty-four hours a day
So do you want to eat it here or take it away?
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Tent
(Stanshall)
So, you've no rejection, shall we say... with the ladies...
Well, uh, sometimes I want to...
All right, all right, ah ah ah ah ah
I'm gonna get you in my tent tent tent tent tent
Where we can both experiment ment ment ment ment
Yeah yay, it's so convenient ent ent ent ent
Let's take a taxi through my tent
Oh, yay, my love is so inscrutable
In a stoic sort of way
But, by baby, it's as beautiful
As a tourniquet
I'm gonna I'm gonna I'm gonna I'm gonna I'm gonna I'm gonna
I'm gonna get you in my tent tent tent tent tent
Whoa whoa, it's only common sense sense sense
I know that you won't mind the stench stench stench
Of the sacrament
I won't let this love destroy her
I can't control this paranoia
I'll have to get a show biz lawyer
To stop me
Kill smash smash thrill spill drive fight bite trap scream tear scritch
shout
Tent! Tent! Tent! Tent!
You'll be laughing like a lunatic
That just got away
Howling like a hypocrite
At an ?auto dufee?
I'm gonna get you in my tent tent tent tent tent
We'll find out where the woozle went went went went went
We'll fill his footprints with cement ment ment ment
We'll dance the tango in my tent
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Testing
Hello testing, one...
Are we on? Are we on?
bass plugged in? Okay...
Hello testing (one two)
Testing (ONE TWO)
How do you do?
Testing (one two)
It's ONE
derful
TWO
be here
Testing one two, testing one two
Two
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
The Bride Stripped Bare By "Bachelors"
(Stanshall/Innes)
So the boys got together and formed a band...uh, f'fate played the
straight man, and since then they've never looked back...
You, lads, welcome to Club B, I've seen you on the telly with your long
hair and pimples. (pop pop)
We arrived at the gig looking rough
Not happy, we'd all had enough
Of eight hours on the road (honk!)
Legs Larry said, eeh, "It's the boozer for me, dear boy."
Yup, yup, yes indeedy
And the hotel reception was empty and cold
With Ôorrid red wallpaper forty years old
It stank like a rhino house!
Mr. Slater said, "Pooh, I can smell Vindaloo."
"Oh, really?" "No, Sir, O'Reilly!"
Hobnob
And we wave to the people who frown
At our hair as we ride into town
And Chalky and Nozz had set up the gear
At the club where the "Dohl Pal Show" would appear
In person as themselves (oarf! oarf!)
In person as themselves
"Then Neil, Fred, and I played darts for awhile."
"Before we switched on our theatrical smiles!"
"Hey, you remember!"
Hot dogs on sale in t' foyer!
Hey...
You can have a drink in your dressing rooms, lads, but you can't come
into club looking like that. We can't oblige. Thank you.
Hey, Redneck!
We've had em all ere, you know, Tommy Ray.
Oh, aye?
That's a brand new scratch on the piano, cost you 75 quid to put that
right.
Whoa, who did that?
Aye, remember Frank Fesher
And Buddy Greece!
Aye!
Put off thought really, ere, doesn't it?
Whoa, what?
Will you take your empty glasses back to the bar?
Any artiste mentioning football will be paid off immediately.
Hoover
It's not for meself, lads, it's for me daughter.
Five pints of lager, and one Coke!
It's not me, lads, it's the manager what makes the rules.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
The Equestrian Statue
There once was a very famous man
On his famous horse he'd ride through the land
The people used to see him everywhere
When he died, they put a statue in the square
(hooray)
Here comes the Equestrian Statue
Prancing up and down the square
Little old ladies stop 'n' say
"Well, I declare!"
Once a month on a Friday there's a man
With a mop and bucket in his hand
To him it's just another working day
So he whistles as he rubs and scrubs away
(hooray)
Here comes the Equestrian Statue
Prancing up and down the square
Little old ladies stop 'n' say
"Well, I declare!"
It's a sight to bring you joy, you feel so gay
And it's guaranteed to brighten up your day
If it's gray
(hooray)
Here comes the Equestrian Statue
Prancing up and down the square
Little old ladies stop 'n' say
"Well, I declare!"
It's a sight to bring you joy, you feel so gay
And it's guaranteed to brighten up your day
If it's gray
Feel so gay
Feel so gay
Feel so gay
Feel so gay
Feel so gay
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
The Hard To Get
Hi hi hi, low low low
Hey hey hey, quick quick slow
Here's a brand new dance
I'll tell you how it's done
It's a little unusual
And not much fun
It's not like the bump
It's not like the hustle
And it'll never never never
Be a film by Ken Russell
It's the hard to get, hard to get
Everybody's doin' the hard to get
Hard to get, hard to get
Everybody's doin' the hard to get
It's easy to do
You soon get the knack
You just shrug your shoulders and turn your back!
And do the hard to get, hard to get
Everybody's doin' the hard to get
Hard to get, hard to get
Everybody's doin' the hard to get
Keep your distance
Keep your cool
Let no one come near you
That's the golden rule
Hard to get
Hi hi hi, low low low
Hey hey hey, quick quick slow
You just groove around
When you do this dance
You don't give no one
A second glance
But sure as X is X
And there are stars up above
The hard to get
Is a dance of love
So do the hard to get, hard to get
Everybody's doin' the hard to get
Hard to get, hard to get
Everybody's doin' the hard to get
It's easy to do
You soon get the knack
You just shrug your shoulders and turn your back!
And do the hard to get, hard to get
Everybody's doin' the hard to get
Hard to get, hard to get
Everybody's doin' the hard to get
Be unapproachable! Remain aloof!
Pass the time of day with no one!
Be on your own!
Hard to get
Hard to get, hard to get
Everybody's doin' the hard to get
Hard to get, hard to get
Everybody's doin' the hard to get
Hard to get, hard to get
Everybody's doin' the hard to get
Hard to get, hard to get
Everybody's doin' the hard to get
Well everybody
Is doin'
the hard
To get.....
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Them
They came in countless numbers
Without hope, without hopelessness
On jelly limbs, faceless,
Crawling out of the living sea
The green world welcomed them
It sweetened the air for them
And above all, the sun warmed them
And dried them
By night, in dreamless sleep
The new life filled them
Piping strange harmonies in the blood
Fusing the beginnings of bones
Then hunger awoke them
And sleepy with a sense of being
They arose and moved inland
Fulfilling their new-found needs
They called out to one another
The winds carried their cries
Over mountains, through forests,
Across deserts and oceans
Great distances were traveled
The strong devoured the weak
The quick devoured the slow
The cunning devoured the foolish
They fed on each other without malice
or remorse
Their purpose was survival
Life was their achievement
They formed into groups
Some took to the air
Some burrowed underground
And some returned to the water
From icecap to icecap
The globe rang with their cleverness
And with each turn
Gave them meaning
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
These Things
If there's a song to sing I wanna sing it
If there's a joy to bring I wanna bring it
If there's a gift to give I wanna give it
If there's a life to live I wanna live it
These things I want to do
I want to do for you
If there's a way to go I wanna go
If there's a love...
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
The Time of Our Lives
We don't know what's going on
We don't know how it works
It's all the same to you and me
That's how the pickle squirts
'Cause we're all having the time of our lives
the time of our lives
the time of our lives
Yes we're all having the time of our lives
the time of our lives
Tonight!
Oh you can sneak time
and you can dream time
But just like some drummers
we've had the often damaging experience of working with
You just can't keep time
Cause we're all having the time of our lives
the time of our lives
the time of our lives
We're all having the time of our lives
the time of our lives
Tonight!
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
The Womble Bashers of Walthamstow
(McGough/Innes)
We're the Womble bashers from Walthamstow
We make Womble trouble wherever we go
From Wimbledon to Wembly Park
We bash Wombles for a lark
In the early days they was okay
In a long-haired sort of way
Collectin' litter and everything
Trouble was they started to sing
COR!
Next thing they was in the charts
Prancing round like a load of tarts
Ever since Top Of The Pops t.v.
They fink they're better then you and me
We're the Womble bashers from Walthamstow
We make Womble trouble wherever we go
From Wimbledon to Luton, Beds
We play soccer wif Wombles 'eads
Whoever 'eard of cuddly toys
Makin' such a bodily noise
Their mimin' ability's minimal
If you ask me the whole fing's criminal
So if you've got a Womble in your home
You'd better watch out when your alone
'cause one dark night we'll make a call
Bash the Womble, you and all!
We're the Womble bashers from Walthamstow
We make Womble trouble wherever we go
From Wimbledon to John O'Groates
We wear Wombleskin fur coats
We're the Womble bashers from Walthamstow
We make Womble trouble wherever we go
From Wimbledon to Wembly Park
We bash Wombles for a lark
We're the Womble bashers from Walthamstow
We make Womble trouble wherever we go
From Wimbledon to Luton, Beds
We play soccer with Wombles 'eads...
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
The Worm and the Angel
One night I dreamed that I was dead
A butterfly flew into my head
"How do ya do" she said
"I'm an angel"
She said no more, she said no less
I said "can you get me out of this mess
If you can well then I guess you must be an
angel"
But then a worm crawled up my nose
And said to the butterfly "I suppose
You think because of your beautiful clothes
You're an angel"
Well the butterfly smm-iled a knowing smile
And said "a miss is as good as a mile
Nothing on earth can cramp the style of an angel"
Then the worm said "I'm not satisfied
And if you'll kindly step outside
In a civilised way we can soon decide who's an angel"
Well I was turnin' in my grave
The worm began to rant and rave
And the butterfly did not behave like an angel
Then I awoke and found them gone
I looked at the trees and the morning sun
and wondered if the worm had won or the angel
It's not every day you see the light
But after such a restless night
I knew that only a worm could fight an angel
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
The Worst is Yet to Come
And the sky stands to attention waiting for the sign
And the moon calls to her warriors and the warriors fall in line
And the sky and the moon and the warriors move slowly into battle
"Tis us you hear when the breathing fails and the heart begins to rattle
And the worst is yet to come
The worst is yet to come
Yes the worst is yet to come
Famine, fire, upheaval
Civil war and hate
The people scream for mercy
But their screaming comes too late
Disease throws up its corpses
The air is dank and stale
Archipelagos of bellies
Salmon, shark and whale
There is thunder underground and the sun goes round and round
There is thunder underground and the sun goes round and round
There is thunder underground and the sun goes round and rou-hou-hound!
And the worst is yet to come
The worst is yet to come
The worst is yet to come
And the worst is yet to come
But the...
Goody-goody good times
Outnumber the bad times!
Everybody knows...
So today,
We'll laugh and be happy!
Tip tippy tip tappy!
And chase all the blues away!
Pass the Veras...
We'll chase all the blues away...
Lets jazz!!!
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Things I Could've Said
Forgive me if I look elusive
But do you think I choose the way I feel?
Remember what you see
Is just the part of me I can't conceal
Remember me to all your friends outside the door
Don't think that I don't know just what they're waiting for
I'm a nervous wreck
I have no need for self-respect
Although I shake my head
When I think of all the things I could've said
What's the use in cryin' after all is said and done
It's not the end in fact it's only just begun
Now I have to try and look the future in the eye
Although I shake my head
When I think of all the things I could've said
Is it any wonder that I'm down
All I have to do is look around
I thought it could get better, I was wrong
Could it be I waited far too long?
One, two, three, four, five, six, seven, eight
No more taking chances
Now I've got the choice
There must be a purpose
Each time I raise my voice
No more tongue in cheek
And I will think before I speak
Although I shake my head
When I think of all the things I could've said
Although I shake my head
When I think of all the things I could've said
I shake my head
When I think of all the things I could've said
I shake my head
When I think of all the things I could've said
I shake my head
When I think of all the things I could've said
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Think Before You Speak
The world is full of people
With lots of things to say
Some of them are false, and some are true
But there's something to be said for each and every one
So here is my advice to you
Think before you speak
Just think before you speak
A thoughtless string of words is strictly for the birds
So think before you speak
Think before you speak
Just think before you speak
If your mind is in a clutter
Stuff and nonsense you will utter
Causing everyone to mutter, "Silly girl.
Her poor little head is in a whirl."
Think before you speak
Just think before you speak
Tomorrow never comes
And it's just as true today
If you don't know what you mean
Then you don't mean what you say
So think before you speak
Just think before you speak
Give your brain the simple task
Of choosing what you ask
And think before you speak
Just think before you speak
Whattaya do... before you speak?
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
This Love Of Ours
This love of ours is like playing card houses
Not easy to rebuild and sometimes unfulfilled
So don't be uncertain
Drawing the curtains
On wide open windows whenever the wind blows
Come rain or come shine our love measures time
Love can surprise you and love can disguise you
with shadows and pain no one can explain
Only love has the answers so lets join the dancers
And spend the night spinning a brand-new beginning
Say thanks for the flowers
And this love of ours
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Three At A Time
Three at a time, three at a time
Troubles, they say
Come three at a time
Everyone knows
'bout the highs and the lows
So, look on the bright side
As the saying goes
It's not the end, my friend
When all is said and done
Two at a time
Two at a time
It happens to people
Two at a time
Everyone cries, ooooooo
When a love dies
Don't be disillusioned
Open up your eyes
Take it from me
You're not the only one
When all is said and done
Well, is it any wonder
You feel the way you do?
It's easy to go under
When you're feeling blue
One at a time
One at a time
Pick up the pieces
One at a time
That's the way now
Everyone knows
That's how it goes
Come rain or come sunshine
Any way the wind blows
It's not the end
It's only just begun
When all is said and done
When all is said and done
When all is said and
Done.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Three Piece Suite
Two armchairs and a sofa make our world complete
We just bought a brand new three piece suite
It matches the curtains and the walnut veneer
The hire purchase will finish in a year
Or two
Eating Chinese pizza and staring into space
We are so very lucky to have a nice place
Decent next-door neighbours
With similar values
Throwing weekend parties
With lots and lots of booze
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Time To Kill
The sun is in the sky
The stars still burn
Beneath my feet the earth is newly-turned
All the seeds are sown
And when they're fully grown
I shall sleep just like a stone in shallow water
A little time to live
Is such a lot of time to kill
Keep on moving even when you're standing still
Looking for an end and wondering how or when it will
But when its gone and in the past
The stars will surely last
Forever
The sun is in the sky
The stars still burn
Beneath my feet the earth is newly-turned
All the seeds are sown
And when they're fully grown
I shall sleep just like a stone in shallow water
A little time to live
Is such a lot of time to kill
Keep on moving even when you're standing still
Looking for an end and wondering how or when it will
But when its gone and in the past
The stars will surely last
Forever
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Tinsel and String
In the name of Jesus Christ
Christmas time is here again
Peace on Earth, goodwill to men
In the name of Jesus Christ
In the name of Jesus Christ
Happy faces all aglow
Paper chains and mistletoe
In the name of Jesus Christ
Oh, newborn King
Your praise we sing
These gifts we bring
Tinsel and string
In the name of Jesus Christ
Shoppers up and down the street
Lots to drink and lots to eat
In the name of Jesus Christ
In the name of Jesus Christ
Lots of money changing hands
Enough supplies to meet demands
In the name of Jesus Christ
Oh, newborn King
Your praise we sing
These gifts we bring
Tinsel and string
In the name of Jesus Christ
Christmas time is here again
Peace on Earth, goodwill to men
In the name of Jesus Christ
In the name of Jesus Christ
All things bright and beautiful
The thought that counts is in us all
In the name of Jesus Christ
Oh, newborn King
Your praise we sing
These gifts we bring
Tinsel and string
Oh, newborn King
Your praise we sing
These gifts we bring
Tinsel and string
Oh, newborn King
Your praise we sing
These gifts we bring
Tinsel and string
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Topless A-Go-Go
Slick Willie was a shoeshine boy
Workin' downtown, 42nd Street
He had a little racket dealin' out some packets
that no one ever saw him eat
Well Rita was a go-go dancer
in a bar just across the street
While Willie shined shoes Rita swung her boobs
to a hunky, funky, junkier beat
Topless-A-Go-Go
Put a little shine on your shoes
Dress up nice, 'cause you're in paradise
And you chase away the mean ol' blues
Well Willie knew Rita danced topless
And Rita knew Willie shined shoe
Because very night among the flashing lights
They'd come out 'n' say "How do you do?"
There each went about their business
Until the break of day
Then they count out the bucks while the garbage trucks
Tow the rest of the night away
Topless-A-Go-Go
Put a little shine on your shoes
Dress up nice, 'cause you're in paradise
And you chase away the mean ol' blues
Dooby doop doo
Doobly doobly doo
Waah waah
Dooby doop doo
Oooh oooh
Well Willie was found in an alley
And Rita got stabbed by a drunk
A telephone call replaced "The Belle of the Ball"
and there was someone else dealin' out junk
Well if you can't see the moral of this story
Well then you can't see the trees for the wood
Because the things that are done in the name of fun
Can cost a whole lot more than they should
Topless-A-Go-Go
Put a little shine on your shoes
Dress up nice, 'cause you're in paradise
And you chase away the mean ol'...
Topless-A-Go-Go
Put a little shine on your shoes
Dress up nice, 'cause you're in paradise
And you chase away the mean ole' blues
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
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