Leave Farnham around lunchtime – easy drive to London and then it is nose to tail so that instead of arriving nice and ‘first gig’ early we arrive late. Mickey is already there having just popped across from Surrey while John has been stuck in traffic for hours, so he arrives latest. Once you get to the 100 Club you have to back into a tiny courtyard and then park right up against buildings and unload down two flights of steps. At the moment we have two non-carriers of equipment – Ken for obvious reasons and Griff who has hurt his back. We took Griff to an osteopath earlier in the day but his back is still very sore. Realise that a road crew is essential if you are going to go on the road at any age after 40. Sound -check luckily takes very little time and then it is all squeeze into the dressing room till showtime.

Have to say doing your own support is a new concept – but the audience love it. They are all Neil fans anyway so it is like a double helping of all things nice. Again they love the new songs so this frees up Neil’s set list and means he can experiment a little.. Mind you if he does suddenly go into a few bars of ‘Urban Spaceman’ a tremendous cheer goes up. Neil has to do a one-man show today because Tom has a gig with one of his other bands –‘Big Strides’ but he will be back tomorrow and for the rest of the tour. New songs like ‘One of Those People’ and ‘Evening sun’ take on another dimension with drums and double bass.

A twenty minute break while Neil gets into Rutles mode and I sell CDs. Lovely people telling me how long they have been fans – 37years in one case which goes almost as far back as the first Bonzo gigs in places like The Duragon Arms in South London when the show was about upsetting as many people as they could with explosions, farts, belches – very avant-garde in those days. The explosions were set off in metal containers and deafening. If you did that now you would probably be sued, but then this sort of anarchy was in its infancy. Later bands like The Who were to take this gentle anarchy up to a new level – destroying guitars, amplifiers and themselves in a the sort of frenzied ‘anti-establishment’ scream. Off stage they threw big parties – I remember ‘fantasy’ areas in Keith and Kim Moon’s garden with wheel barrows full of strawberries and churns full of cream and a car being driven into the swimming pool. It was all part of the sixties dream. It was magic land. The real world, of children and mortgages and bent promoters and record companies, into which we were to emerge a few years later; was then only a hazy cloud on the horizon.

But back to the Bonzos - far from being upset about perforated eardrums and spilt drinks, people loved the show – vulgarity and all. After a couple of hours, the Bonzos would pass a hat round till they had enough money to buy drinks. People always gave generously – hmmm,,,, might revive the hat trick.

And now on to the stage come Neil and the Rutles- John, Mickey, Griff; JJ and Ken. They have had almost no run- through but there is something about those songs which carries the musicians along. From ‘Major Happy’ right through to ‘Shangri-La’ and ‘Grandad’ the musicians enjoy being together again and the audience loves it. Three encores and then signing and finally the ritual of the packing of instruments and the loading of van and the journeys back to Surrey, Suffolk and Cambridge in order to save on hotels in London. Ken’s comment once home, ‘I’VE SURVIVED’.

Lazy day –nice after a good gig. JJ and Griff stay over so we eat a very late lunch outside watching the ducks eat the fish food and the rabbits eating the plants and then leave in plenty of time for London. After about 15 minutes come to a dead stop and find ourselves in a 5 mile tailback. Every road we try is gridlocked so only thing to do is to sit tight, do crosswords, play I-Spy and think of other things. As soon as the jam clears JJ drives like the clappers to get us to London in time. At the 100 Club things are quickly unloaded and the band has the shortest sound check imaginable before the crowds are let in. Gig has provided rolls and fruit which are eaten in a dressing room 15’long by 4’ wide, which also houses the instrument cases. Ken’s comment ‘Ah, the last of many rutling gigs at the 100 Club with all of it’s luxury. Despite that I’ll miss the place’. Every professional musician has played at the 100 Club at some time or another despite the shape of the room, the size of the dressingroom and the difficulties of unloading and parking. There is a great deal of affection for the place – I saw The Sex Pistols there just before they were signed by Virgin – but that’s another story.

Neil comes on with Tom and JJ to cheers and they begin the set with ‘One of Those People’. So glad Neil has ‘friends’ tonight – exhausting enough doing your own support – but Tom and JJ lift the music and push the songs along.. Impossible to get a good photograph of Tom when he’s playing because he is never still. Tom has a love/hate relationship with the bass ‘its like having an awkward girlfriend who never wants to go anywhere’. Very few cars are big enough to hold the bass so it is a question of hauling it to gigs through the underground or on buses. However he/they get there the effort is worth it – he is one cool bass player. Get hold of the Big Strides album if you can – this is the other band Tom works with.

The sound is good and well balanced so you can hear all three instruments separately and together. ‘One Of Those People’ is followed by ‘Rory Motion’ plus adverts. Then ‘ Evening Sun’, all the way through to ‘Hero’. After 45 minutes they take short break and then Neil and JJ come back with the Rutles. There is a tremendous cheer. The crowds are standing, packed like sardines. The band launches into ‘Major Happy’, then John sings ‘Rendez-Vous’ and the band go into ‘Questionnaire’ and ‘Double back Alley’. ‘Good Times Roll’, ‘Goosestepping Mama’ and ‘Hold My Hand’ take the pace up a few notches and ‘With a Girl Like You’ brings it back to the gently lyrical again. Hey Mister(one of my favourites) is followed by another song for John ‘Living in Hope’ and then the huge favourite of audiences everywhere – ‘Cheese and Onions’. ‘I Must be in Love’, ‘Ouch’ and ‘Another Day lead into Piggy in The Middle’, ‘I Love You’ and Johns last song ‘Easy Listening’. ‘Eine Kleine’, ‘Joe Public’, and ‘Lets Be Natural’ lead to another big favourite – ‘Shangri La’ and the song with the message brings up the rear ‘Get Up and Go’ by which time you would have thought Neil would be on his last legs, but no, he does at least three encores one of which is Georges song ‘Isn’t It a pity’- the applause is deafening. Micky – always a sharp dresser on gigs gives up in the torrid eat of the 100 club and appears in black jacket and shorts, which is fine because you can’t see him below the waist. The band’s enthusiasm is infectious and the audience are ecstatic..

Afterwards many people buy ‘Works in Progress’ and comment on the first set –their eyes newly opened to the vast range of Neil’s song writing. This was really the idea behind Neil doing his own support. We quite often find that people have been turned on to the Rutles music without having a clue about what went on before or what else is going on now. In fact I think Neil is just at the start of a whole raft of new songs – wouldn’t be surprised if there is a ‘new’ new album next year. Although the gig is a long one for him he comes off the stage exhilarated and exhausted rather than just exhausted.

Loading the van is turning out to be a trauma. All Mickey’s keyboards have to be fitted in as well as the racks because although he is driving himself, he has no security for his car. Some of John’s drums have to come too and we watch the back wheels of the blue van getting flatter. The stage crew help bring the instruments out and because of the small space and the darkness it seems inevitable something will be left behind. Driving home we stop about half way for coffee to keep us awake for another hour and a half. Once home Neil and I go straight up to bed while the younger element sort the world out…..again, ending up with Tom wrapped in a huge Morroccan cloak sleeping in the garden.

Today is Friday so it must be Stourbridge – west of Birmingham. The ride is longer than we think and we have no time to check in at hotel – especially when I take an unexpected half an hour detour – it was the American navigator..honest!!. No, not really Ken, I’m sure I misheard. The gig is on an industrial estate - a huge barn of a place with a high stage and a bar near the door. The set takes ages to get together and Mickey can’t find his keyboard pedals without which the keyboards are unplayable. He phones the 100 club to talk to the sound man who says he put them up on a dustbin to keep them safe while loading. Needless to say they are no longer on the bin. General panic while Mickey phones round hire shops trying to locate another set. It is by now after 6pm when most shops have closed for the night. But somehow Mickey finds one that is open and has the particular pedals Mickey uses. So now it is a question of getting them up from London – a cab is booked and all we can do is wait. By now it is 8.30 and the Rutles are due to go on at 10pm. Only John is convinced they will get there before the gig. Everyone else imagines break downs, traffic jams, wrong turnings etc. Mickey is quietly stressed. The rest have the sound check and the sound is really good – surprising in a big place like this. People are buying CDs T shirts and buttons and realise I have taken too few T-shirts with us. Nothing I can do about it now. Neil + Friends take the stage and do a fantastic set – always best when audience can see them. Hopes of Mickey’s pedals turning up in time are fading. There is a long interval when suddenly at 1 minute to 10 the pedals are rushed through the hall to a stressed out Mickey. He connects them, has a quick run through to check they are OK and The Rutles are introduced. The set was the best yet – probably because of the relief the band felt. They could have just about made it work without Mickey but really he is indispensable. He is ‘the Rutles orchestra’ All those fills and phrases which make all the difference between ordinary and amazing. He also has a great sense of humour and reacts with Neil throughout the set. Great to watch.

In fact have rarely seen the band so animated. They come off after 75 minutes to roars to approval and streams of people queue to say how great it was. A reporter from The Times is making notes – hopefully will give a good write up.

Meanwhile I have been trying to get in touch with the hotel to say we will be late. They tell me there are no bookings under our name. I tell them it has been booked and paid for and we go round in circles until I get them, reluctantly, to give me the names of some of the booked rooms- Simmonds, they said, Halsey etc etc so finally sorted it out. But no-one is tired that night so back at the hotel the night stretches into morning as the guys work on their hangovers aided by jokes and stories from John and Mickey. Memories of the Bonzo days ,staying in theatrical boarding houses with ferocious landladies, one toilet between 8 along an unlit corridor and greasy fried breakfasts. The manic rush to find the best room and then the finding of strange and unnecessary objects under your pillow put there by the others. You were lucky if you could get into your bed at all - the sheets had usually been knotted – we call it apple pie beds over here – cant think why. The hotels and the tours are quite civilised now by comparison.

A short drive today to Stratford On Avon so we sit in the foyer of the hotel waiting as one by one the guys appear, Conversation is quiet in keeping with the hangovers. During the journey to Stratford Griff tells me of his last tour where they had a road crew with guitar technicians etc, so that all the band had to do when arriving at a gig was walk on and then walk off at the end of it and be driven home. No nasty humping, restringing, tuning or any kind of sorting the stage out. Even watching the Rutles lifting their amps and flight cases every night is traumatic. Next tour it will all be different, I think. Dream on.

Cox’s yard in Stratford is tiny with a low stage. There is nowhere for Mickey to set up his keyboards so he has to put them in a space off the stage next to the bar. It would be a good for Neil Innes + friends if there were any seats. For this gig there is standing only so realise we might not see much of the band tonight. The theatre is in a sort of crafty complex with cafes and little shops right on the river and the dressing room is the best ever. Huge with sofas, and dining table with chairs as well as a balcony overlooking the river where ducks and swans were in various stages of courtship. To the right a long and very old roman footbridge with arches and, every now and then a punt glides silently through. We all have a very civilised supper sitting at a table and then Neil Tom and JJ begin their set.

It goes well but it is difficult because only the tops of their heads can be seen by anyone further than 5 rows from the front. Some people come in at the back and talk and laugh loudly as if they were in a bar- seemed to have no idea anything was going on. I ask them why they bothered to pay just to talk amongst themselves and they ignore me completely. I look down to check I am still there – an existential moment. People did enjoy the set but I am glad to leave the hot noisy space for a while to stand on the dressing room balcony and watch the ducks and swans mating and dancers cavorting at a party in a marquee across the river. Music of George Michael mixes with the Rutles – mmmmm. Afterwards as Neil signs CDs, Tom helps me to pack away his instruments and we drive to a Travelodge for the night. ‘My get up and go got up and went after overdoing it on Get Up and Go’. Ken’s comment after enjoying himself too much.

Around 5am I wake and almost immediately think of Neil’s, guitar mike and ukele holder both of which fix on to the voice mike. I think about them because I realise I have no memory of putting them in the cases. Decide against asking for the van to be unpacked again to check since the gig is quite close to the hotel. Mickey drives me back and we search, find nothing and drive to Cambridge hoping the sound guy at The Junction will have some spare fittings. Stop at John’s pub for lunch and then to the Sleep Inn Hotel for a couple of hours. Have to give the ‘Sleep Inns’ a bit of a plug here. They are a lot better than travelodges and as cheap. Plug over. Finally drive to The Junction. Was here that we saw Emo Phillips if you have been paying attention and has this place changed since then. Must have had lots of the green stuff spent on it. It is still a wide open space with a large high stage-perfect for The Rutles. Not only that but the stage is relatively near the car park and there are technicians on hand to help with the unloading so everything gets carried through painlessly. I am trying to sort out contractual details with the manager when a cry of joy rings to the rafters. The guitar mike and the violin holders are where they should be, packed with the leads in the piano flightcase. Felt good about that but also slightly uneasy about remembering nothing about packing them the night before. Griff brings his wife, Mary which means I can indulge in girl-talk which has been severely lacking over the last few days. The high stage is good for Neil Innes+Friends - the sound is great and the audience is loving it. The Rutles have all the room they need and although they themselves do not feel over happy about the sound on stage, it sounds really good to the audience and Mary and I dance through the whole set. Strange how few people dance even when there is the space. Mary also turns out to be excellent at selling CDs so we have a good night generally. John’s wife Elaine comes for the Rutles set with their sons Matt and Rue and after the gig John and Griff go home while the rest of us head off down the motorway to slumberland at the Sleep Inn.

Monday is usually a day to avoid on the road. No-one really wants to go out on a Monday so the audiences are invariably smaller than they would be any other day Also we have a four hour drive to Chester, just south of Liverpool to Telfords Warehouse. The weather is predictably June, as Ken so rightly remarks ‘just when you think it is OK to pack away the jumper hat and scarf’. You Californians have no idea.

When the guys get to Telford’s Warehouse, Neil walks in and walks straight out again. The stage is even smaller than Cox’s Yard. Mickey can not see how he will fit his keyboards on the stage which is again low. Tom’s double bass is inches below the ceiling so less bouncing for him tonight. Together the band work out exactly how they can cram themselves on. The venue is a lovely place to go for a drink right on the edge of a canal and again a good gig for Neil + Friends if they put seats in. The manager decides to seat half the audience and let the other half stand which actually works well. The dressing room is not good however, tiny with no space for stage clothes or bags and nowhere for a very tired John to sleep for an hour before the show. We go up to the restaurant to eat but the food takes so long to arrive that Neil, Tom and JJ have to leave most of it. However Neil’s first set goes down really well and afterwards I cover up the merchandise and go down to the side of the canal to cool off. Get back half way through the Rutles set and spend the rest of the set dancing. The manager has put a huge fan at the side of the stage so the band are relatively comfortable although maybe a tad claustrophobic. Later we get back to our rather grand hotel. Most of us have ground floor room with a large doors opening onto the lawn – you can get good deals on a Monday night if you know where to look. A guy called Brian Saunders (Roadrunner) does the booking for us and he is amazing. We never know what to expect and there is only the occasional naf hotel which is amazing when you realise what a low budget we are on. It is good when the hotel has a lounge and a nightporter/barman so you can relax without having to go to a bedroom. I gather one or two guys stayed up late but Neil returned after half an hour exhausted.

All the way down to Southampton on the south coast so up and off early – 10 ish, a couple of stops for coffee and sandwiches etc etc etc and we arrive at the hotel. This is the only bummer. Here you have a code you have to remember to keep on you to get in and out. Half of each room is taken up with a cupboard which opens out into a mini kitchen and the beds are fitted around that. We have about an hour before the gig so we try to avoid looking at the room and relax. Then off to The Brook. Now you are talking. This has to be the best venue. The space is on two levels – standing below and seating above. Two bars, good sound. Amazing dressing rooms – a room with comfy chairs, a lounge with a TV, a kitchen, a bathroom and a balcony. I take some Rutles photos on the balcony. The show begins and both halves get huge applause.

Afterwards curries are ordered and eaten in the upstairs bar. Mickey is driving home tonight- very wise considering the alternative, so his gear is loaded into his car. There are hugs and goodbyes and ‘see you in Liverpools’ – the very very very last Rutles gig…….. until the Reunion.

The audience getting into the spirit of the thing at The Brook

JJ, Ken, Griff and Mickey with John and Neil seated

And with Tom

Going over a few numbers at home ready for the next visit

And finally a few thoughts and comments from the band:

Griff ‘Why not a World Comeback Tour. We could go to the gym, dye our hair etc etc’

JJ The only good thing about not having a personal technician or roadie is that you learn how to

fix a snare drum with fuse wire.

John ‘Rutalot, the musical ?’

Neil ‘Yeh!! Other peoples jokes set to music you CAN remember!!.’

And finally finally one more of Tom’s poems:

Why oh waiku

‘I sit with lager

writing, aware that my pen

will run out aga ‘

and finally to the third and at the penumtimate moment a word or two from Mickey

So, touring with the Rutles.

Firstly, I have to say it was a real pressure, & all the musicians were absolutely excrement.

Favourite moment?

The Brook, Southampton, Easy Listening, song counted in, played the intro, first line didn't arrive. Why? Wom's on the phone!

"Sorry, no, can't talk now, I'm just about to sing a song . . . . . . "

Brilliant..

Which brings us nicely on to the "Wom-fills".

A drum fill usually happens over a set amount of beats, commonly at the end of a phrase to mark the start of a new section.

That's the theory.

Wom-fills have their own set of rules.

They may start on time, but not obligatory.

They may be the same tempo as the rest of the song, but it's not vital.

They may finish on the beat, but either side is acceptable.

The game is catching the front of the fill, surfing along with it & trying to get off at the same time.

Tricky, but good fun.

Neil, "Captain on the bridge", was gorgeous as ever.

I particularly liked the bouncy piano stand. In the trade known as an X-frame, it's the stand you put a portable keyboard on. The problem is they flex, a lot!

I raise this issue because many people will have heard a few bum notes from the piano.

It's not the fault of the pianist, it's the stand that turns the piano into a moving target!!!

Honest.

Mind you, you have to laugh, don't you?

A nice addition to this tour was the arrival of the Wookiee.

What a nice bloke, lovely stand-up bass player, great poet, constantly helpful, always cheery, & if you're reading this, Chewy, I searched all over Glastonbury for you having forgotten the name of your band. Sorry I missed you, I really did try.

The other bonus on the tour was, of course, the rock-chick.

What a difference it makes to have a bit of totty around.

I don't know if everyone's aware of the wonderful things Ivvy can do with a camera.

I've seen the results & my hat is well & truly taken off. I was extremely grateful when she gave me a photograph at the end of the tour.

Talking of hats off, major praise to Rutling Ken.

Brilliant (& I don't use that word lightly) guitarist, but what a trooper!

Heart surgery, straight out on tour, & still trying to carry stuff out to the van! Daft-head!

Actually, when you stop to think about it, Ken post-op, me with my back, Griff with his back, the sixties club with their dementia, it only really left the wookiee & JJ fighting fit!!

What an outfit.

But I wouldn't change a thing about them.

Thank you for letting me be part of it.

Mickey

Yvonne's diary #1 UK trip 2005

Yvonne's diary #2 Rutles Farewell Tour

Yvonne's diary #3 August 2005

Yvonne's diary #4 New York 2005

Yvonne's diary #5 Bonzo Reunion Tour

Yvonne's diary #6 Canada/US 2006

Yvonne's diary #7 May/June 2006